Among the many absurdities that make The Bachelor a near perfect mirror of our era, the most potent must be the bizarre refrain: Here for the right reasons. In a franchise that encourages one man to simultaneously date thirty women (or vice versa), contestants bolster their own virtue by proclaiming that they are "here for the right reasons" while the titular character lobs suspicious barbs at suitors who don't seem to be "here for the right reasons." Of course, in forty-something seasons of the show, no one has ever thought to explain what the right reasons might be